Do You Know What Is Unconditional About Love?

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We talk about *unconditional love/loving* a lot. However, do we know of what we’re speaking? Or do we throw around this term unconsciously? Do we really explore what unconditional love means, or do we just think we know from what we’ve observed in others?

Let’s journey to explore…

Unconditional love is loving someone, something, or some situation or condition in life without condition. You’re probably thinking, ‘Yes, I know.’ Yes, but… Do we really?

Unconditional love is not present when you love them…

…as long as they agree with what you say and do. That’s a condition.

…as long as they laugh when you joke, or smile back at you when you smile. Those are conditions.

…as long as they get riled up by the same things you do. That’s conditional.

…as long as they love you back and in just the way you want them to. That is conditional.

Unconditional love is not present when you love them…

…because it’s good for you, good to you, or…

…because it makes you feel good about you.

Or even, …because you know it will all turn out in the end.

You ever noticed all the conditions we place on our love?

The following is a great definition of love…

Love — Unconditional positive regard and acceptance.

In this definition, love becomes more than affection, more than chemistry, more than really good feelings. It becomes what it truly can be – vast, expansive and utterly inclusive.

Giving unconditional love requires not needing anything from anyone. It requires being responsible at a new level for how you feel, and what you feel.

It’s not horrible to not be able, or even not be willing to love completely unconditionally — WITHOUT any condition whatsoever. It can be the tallest of orders. And you are human. It’s okay.

It’s not about some idea of you, or what you could do (or who you could be) if you tried harder. It can be simply about who you are right now. In this moment. Right here.

And when you can truly love that idea – the idea of loving yourself no matter how you love another, or even, life itself… well, isn’t that one step closer to loving someone unconditionally?

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(Thank you to Iyanla Vanzant for her definition of love.)
Copyright © 2017 The REvolution Of Bliss.com – All rights reserved

To Err Is Human… Divine

Oftentimes have I heard you speak of one who commits a wrong as though he were not one of you, but a stranger unto you and an intruder upon your world.

But I say that even as the holy and the righteous cannot rise beyond the highest which is in each one of you,

So the wicked and the weak cannot fall lower than the lowest which is in you also.

And as a single leaf turns not yellow but with the silent knowledge of the whole tree,

So the wrong-doer cannot do wrong without the hidden will of you all.

Like a procession you walk together towards your god-self.

You are the way and the wayfarers.

And when one of you falls down he falls for those behind him, a caution against the stumbling stone.

Ay, and he falls for those ahead of him, who though faster and surer of foot, yet removed not the stumbling stone.

The Prophet, Kahlil Gibran 1923

This is a tough subject. In social media, and in social circles, we like to impugn publicly those whom we believe have done others wrong. We have an attachment to the concept of justice and what it entails. However, there is often no compassion in this concept of justice. There is only a single focus on making just what has been “unjust.” This can be a very fragile subject, as intense emotions can be tied to any conversation that presents a different point of view than the one currently held by the majority – whatever majority you’re speaking to.

Compassion can be a complex subject. It requires a patience with yourself and your heart. It requires being willing to shine a light where we tend to forget that no light is shone… within each one of us. Though we often cannot see it for ourselves, having no compassion for others can point to our lack of compassion for ourselves. The simplicity of this statement can be obscured greatly by our determined single focus to make right all wrongs.

Compassion is a warm and loving embrace. And because it includes that word – love – we find it difficult to bring it to those nasty, painful places where we don’t think love can live. Compassion is not fragile. It can live in all kinds of climates, under all sorts of conditions. Compassion can thrive anywhere. We often don’t give it enough credit for its resilience.

We have compassion already. We have it for the people we love. We have it for those we believe need it the most. But for those who we feel do not fit the bill of what we consider moral or ethical, we withhold compassion. But we don’t discriminate. We do that with ourselves too.

If you cannot find compassion for the intensely emotional fights you’re in, you don’t have to start there. You don’t have to begin with your biggest obstacles. Start small. Begin where you can actually envision yourself with compassion. Begin with something small about you.

We all can have greater empathy, consideration, sense of redemption and resilience, and compassion for ourselves. We can apply this compassion to ourselves first, and in the application to ourselves, we can allow for whatever pathways open before us. Who knows what those will be?

Do we have to do any of this? No. We do not. There is nothing that we should do in this life, and nothing that we must do in our lifetimes. This applies to all aspects of life as well. Do you have to eat healthier? Must you eat healthier? You may say, yes. But is it true? Do you have to eat healthier, or is it a possible way of living that would allow for greater possibilities of feeling good in your body, knowing you’re doing something good for yourself and maybe even, longevity? Do you have to stop punishing your spouse for being the way they are? Or would it save your relationship and open a pathway for new communication and a new level of intimacy? You could keep punishing them. The consequence for that continued behavior might be them divorcing you. There are consequences for continued behavior. The same goes for choosing to constantly fight and punish others. That word, others, includes you.

There is always an opportunity to experience compassion. Compassion is born organically of healing wounds.

There are wounds that never show on the body that are deeper and more hurtful than anything that bleeds.

— Anonymous

We have a great deal of pain when it comes to injustice. We are driven to fight our way to justice. However, there is a law that we deny when we fight something. The law says that wherever you put your focus and attention, that place, thing or how you view someone, a place or a thing grows. When you fight something, you keep your focus and your attention both on the fight and what you are fighting. Put simply, you are focused on what you don’t want. That is the opposite of the intention of the fight, especially when the fight is intended to eliminate the object being fought.

What we resist, persists.

You may not make peace with the greatest of your fights for injustice, or otherwise. You don’t have to. Life is a journey of thousands of steps. Choose what your steps will be.

But know that you can find your way to compassion and release of fights and fighting. You can make peace with that which has threatened you. When you find release (and relief), what you’ve made peace with no longer threatens you.

There is peace. It is here. Peace was here all along, waiting to be claimed. By you.

Copyright © 2021 the revolution of bliss.com – All rights reserved

Your World. Your Creation.

The world we live in is not all around us. Though if we look, we may think we see it surely. I mean isn’t the world, the world?

I invite you to consider the world we live in is not the one we see all around us.

The world we live in is not the planet Earth we all cohabitate upon. Though we may be sure of terra firma just as sure as it lies beneath our feet.

The world we each live in is the world that lives between our ears.

Not that it physically resides there, between our ears. That’s just the place where we most often refer to its existence. That’s where we most often think our mind is, located where our brain is — which the two are not one in the same, by the way, but most definitely influence each other’s existence.

The world we live in lives in our perceptions. Our points of view carved out and sculpted by our experiences, the things we’ve been told, the messages we hear from music and media and the people, places and things we consider authorities in the… well, in the world around us.

Our mind is the world we all live in, no matter how much you and I think we live out on the globe we reside on.

And right there is the opportunity to create our worlds moment by moment.

Each of our worlds exist of nothing but thought, which is the same thing as perception.

So how is our world not completely malleable, defined by each moment we live, and never carved in stone? Of course it is. Flexible, able to be sculpted in an instant, and renewable.

It’s your mind. It’s your world. It is yours to create.

Copyright © 2021 the revolution of bliss — All rights reserved

Is Your Success Making You Miserable?

Our happiness is our success.

Monique McIntyre, Founder of the (r)evolution of bliss

Success. Happiness.

Two things we get crazy about.

Money.

Something we get really crazy about.

We are driven by our ideas about success, happiness and money. Driven to succeed. Driven to have money. Driven to be happy. Often, at all costs.

We have conflicting definitions of success. We know, in our hearts, that success is not what we have, but who we are, and yet we are constantly defining ourselves and our success by what we have in material possessions, or a career, or a job, or in popularity on our social media accounts, or in trinkets, or in educational degrees, or in IQ points, or in friends, or even in the number of contacts we have in our smartphones. No matter what our hearts say, we more often than not find ourselves “rolling with” what society deems as success.

Just think about it…

Think of who in your personal circle is the person you consider to be most successful. Who are they? Actually say their name out loud.

This person should be the person you immediately think of as successful, the one your brain makes the most immediate connection to; not someone you have to work at equating them with success.

Now, think about how successful this person is. Think about all of the things you can see make up their success. What are those? If you really want to see your relationship to success clearly, write these things down.

Consider that many of the things they have are many of the reasons you relate to them as successful. Just consider it fully. It doesn’t have to be true. I’m not convincing you of anything here. Just inviting you to participate.

Yes, there absolutely may be attributes to this person’s character that appeal to you as factors for their success. However, I challenge you to look for someone in your personal circle that has equal to those attributes but not the same outer trappings and see if you believe them to be as successful, or even inhabiting the same realm. What I’m saying is that if the person were homeless, but a really incredible and self-aware person, would you still qualify them as successful?

(Some of you just said inside your heads, Well, if they were homeless, then they wouldn’t be really self-aware. I invite you to look deeper at that equation / connection in your thinking.)

If we are to find true happiness within ourselves, peace in our desire to be fully ourselves, then we can truly redefine success for ourselves. If we cease being driven by our ideas of success, then our success can be an emanation of our contentment with us as we are; and with life as it is. There is ease in that understanding, and there can be a new opening for a new way of life, and a new definition of success for all of us. Acceptance is key.

Acceptance, however, does not preclude innovation. Acceptance does not preclude wanting more. And it definitely does not preclude improvement. Acceptance is wholly inclusive, not exclusive. So this is not about rebuking money or anything it can buy, or a lifestyle that embraces this. This is not about poverty as nobility. This is not about rebuffing those that are driven by success either, or the popular definition of The American Dream. I will say it again… Acceptance is key.

When we’re no longer driven by our “should’s” and “must do’s,” something else in life becomes possible. When we’re no longer driven by our visions of what we think life is supposed to look like, then we can be happy with just being – really being, with no help from anything outside of us. There is ease in being. There is abundance in ease. There is a new definition of success that can be discerned from both.

What would it be to be truly content, feeling truly successful for just being you? There would be nothing to do… and everything to express.

Copyright © 2021 the revolution of bliss — All rights reserved