How Do You Prioritize Forgiving?

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There’s much value in forgiveness and we read about it all the time… but it has no value, if we don’t use it.

What about the practice of forgiving?

How do we value forgiving? Do we forgive? I mean, do we truly forgive? Do we do it for them, or for us? Is there more we can forgive for? Are there some places we hide where we’re holding back forgiveness because of what we’re afraid it will give the other person?

What will we give them… ?
  • A license to hurt us again?
  • The right to keep hurting others (if not us)?
  • The notion to think they have something over us?
  • A pass so that they don’t have to be remorseful or apologize?

What if we give something up we can’t get back?

All of this thinking points to forgiveness being for them.

It’s not.

Sound familiar? But please don’t shrug it off because it sounds cliche. It’s real.

Forgiveness is a gift for you. It has nothing to do with them.


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Forgiveness begins with the release of anger, hurt, frustration, resentment, regret and any and all other negative emotions built up in that moment, or over time for what seems like the very same transgression by multiple transgressors.

Those are emotions held in you. What if those emotions were hurting you more than them?

Ever take poison and hope for someone else to die? That’s resentment. That’s regret. That’s holding back forgiveness. The poison we take, hoping someone else will die. The absurdity of being human… it’s real. And we can transcend it.

Monique McIntyre

In my next article, I’ll deep dive into what real forgiveness can provide in mental, emotional and physical health. Please stay tuned.

Forgiveness is a real game changer. And it can alter the course of a life. Don’t miss out on it. If you already consider yourself a forgiver, get a deeper cut at your own forgiveness in the next article. This is for everyone.

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Published by MoniqueM

As fierce bliss, I continue to seek and find grace and splendor everywhere. Bliss is a possibility for all of us. I'm here as a guide for anyone who seeks more of their own.

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